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  1. #16
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    After few days he came to me again, and told me to name the price, and he will pay.I said that what he expects is far too much, and that neither me nor any other tennis coach could it.It is impossible to achieve.

    This was the last I saw him.He took his son, and before leaving he just told me that if I do not want to do it he will find someone who will do it.

    Ok, he found someone, but not who will achieve this goal , but one who will destroy everything done in last couple years.
    The father chose a tennis coach (the person never played competitive tennis, and had no results as a tennis coach in competitive tennis)who promised him that his son will play as good as the son of his former coach.That person was not qualified, but that was not enough.He took money, and delegated his son to his assistant.
    The boy needed the best posiible coaching to keep with the things he learned, and he got the worst possible.As I said many times the boy did not have inner motivation so he required enormous energy from the coach.He got none;neither quality coaching.They kept boy as long as possible out of tournaments, because they knew that once the boy plays the tournament the father will see what is going on.And really, after few month when the father demanded that his son plays the tournament it was complete disaster.That was the end of this boy¨s tennis.He never played again.

    What one can learn from this story?The world is not righthous place to live, and one will not listen to beneficial advices rather he will listen to uncompetent, and immoral person who does not care about the others well being except his own, and as such is able to promise everything without any responsibility.

    In the meantime that "coach" became ITF/Tennis Development Officier for Eastern Europe."What a wonderful world"


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    In Depth Description of Bringing a Child Up a Competitive Ladder with Advices and Recommendations
    Last edited by Bubo; 08-08-2009 at 11:36 AM.

  2. #17
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    Now, I would like to describe few more cases of abuse before I try to find the reasons which lie behind this negative behaviour.The abuse can be of any sort:coach - player, coach - parent, parent - coach, referee - player, tennis official - player, coach - tennis official, parent - player (son/daughter).All the previous cases I already described were coach- player abuse.

    Now, I will describe the case when referee for his own benefits abuses a player.Referee should be by definition itself be just and impartial in implementing tennis rules.It happens that because of own interest referee does not referee as one should and is expected to do.This example will illustrate one such case.

    Everybody of us who played competitive tennis had experienced cheating of the opponent.It is more often on hard courts (no marks) than on clay courts.Playing without chair umpire can be very unplesant experience if the opponent tries to win match using everything available (after a while one learns what is counter tactic against opponent who does not play fair )This is reason why I always prefered to play with chair umpire.Then , I could concentrate solely on the game.

    This description will show that chair umpire does not always deserve to carry this honorable name.
    It was National tournament 14 and under played indoors on hard courts.My player played against the player who was coached by Federation Cup coach.From very beginning was faul game.When court was available and players were called on tennis court my player was there, and waiting.The other player did not show up for 20 minutes.When she came, she came embraced with chair umpire of this match.When they started to warm up the other player would hit balls away from my player;when my player came up to the net the opponent would hit hard at her.The chair umpire said nothing.My player won toss, and chose to serve.On first and second point of first game of the match chair umpire called foot fault, and he did 8 more times to my player (none to the opponent) during first set.First set was close, and my player lost 4/6.In second set was 0/6, and umpire called none foot fault what is unusual because it is normal that one when gets tired, loses concentration, and makes more foot faults.

    This example showes how chair umpire directly used his powers to influence the outcome of the match because of the own interest.


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    In Depth Description of Bringing a Child Up a Competitive Ladder with Advices and Recommendations
    Last edited by Bubo; 08-08-2009 at 11:36 AM.

  3. #18
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    Abusive behaviour can be expressed in different ways.It can be expressed as physical and psychological abuse, but there are other forms of abuse too.I already described abuse by chair umpire (which is also a psychological abuse too).Now, I will describe abuse by tennis officials;as a matter of fact secretary of National Tennis Federation.

    My player won Women National Championship and as such had right to get scholarship by National Olimpic Coommitee.She applied through National Tennis Federation which should had formally approved it and send it to NOC.In spite of the fact that National Tennis Federation did not pay this scholarship out of own funds, the secretary kept application in a drawer for one year;as a matter of fact she had not intention to mail it to NOC - the parents of the player took it , and brought to NOC.My player lost funds for one year while the application was in secretary¨s drawer.The funds were far from enough to cover expenses for that year(although everything is important because competitive tennis is very expensive sport), but behavior of tennis official in National Tennis Federation showed how much she "cares" about the plyers she should help in any way possible.

    This is an example of abuse, too.


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    In Depth Description of Bringing a Child Up a Competitive Ladder with Advices and Recommendations
    Last edited by Bubo; 08-08-2009 at 11:37 AM.

  4. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by Robyna View Post
    I think that 'abusive parents' is more to be focused on then 'abusive coaches' as children completely live around their parents more then they do their coach, despite the fact that their coach he a major influence on their tennis life/career.

    Im not sure if anyone heard about this story but I read it somewhere a while back,
    A young girl started playing tennis at a very young age, however had to stop because of her parents financial state. Soon her father became a alcaholic and her mother began gambling. One day, surprisingly, her mother won a lot of money from the lottery and they decided that they'd let their daughter continue tennis so that'd she become a proffesional and they'd take her money (You most likely figured that her parents aren't very good people). But after not playing for years the girl wasn't playing very well so after every lesson, if her father wasn't satisfied with her standard of play, he'd hit her with the racket until she was covered in bruises.

    You see, I don't think that the coach would ever go as far as a parent could go. The coach could 'verbally' attack the child but a parent could do both as they pleased.
    First, I would have to say that "verbal" attack can in long term do more harm than physical attack.Do not think in any way that I approve one or another.

    I would agree with you that parents can be very detrimental to child¨s tennis, and his/her psychological development.
    In the case about German girl I described abusive behaviour by her tennis coach, but I did not by her parents.Her parents made mistake by choosing crooked tennis coach, and consequently wasted time so they wanted to catch up with competition, in the wrong way:

    - at home, they would beat up daughter every time they would think she performed under their standard(who are they to judge the standard of performance!)

    - at home, they would make daughter to make numerous shadow repetitions of certain stroke

    The cause of such parents¨s behaviour was on one hand ambition, and on the other their primitive behaviour.

    Direct consequence of her parents¨s action on the daughter was that she still peed in the bed at age of 10


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    In Depth Description of Bringing a Child Up a Competitive Ladder with Advices and Recommendations
    Last edited by Bubo; 08-08-2009 at 11:37 AM.

  5. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Robyna View Post
    I think that 'abusive parents' is more to be focused on then 'abusive coaches' as children completely live around their parents more then they do their coach, despite the fact that their coach he a major influence on their tennis life/career.

    Im not sure if anyone heard about this story but I read it somewhere a while back,
    A young girl started playing tennis at a very young age, however had to stop because of her parents financial state. Soon her father became a alcaholic and her mother began gambling. One day, surprisingly, her mother won a lot of money from the lottery and they decided that they'd let their daughter continue tennis so that'd she become a proffesional and they'd take her money (You most likely figured that her parents aren't very good people). But after not playing for years the girl wasn't playing very well so after every lesson, if her father wasn't satisfied with her standard of play, he'd hit her with the racket until she was covered in bruises.

    You see, I don't think that the coach would ever go as far as a parent could go. The coach could 'verbally' attack the child but a parent could do both as they pleased.
    I agree with Robyna that abusive parents are more dangerous than abusive coaches, but I think the most abusive to his/her children are parents who coach them, and who are not tennis coaches.Good examples to illustrate this are Pierce, Dokic, Lucic etc.They made out of their children world class players, and in the process they abused them physically and mentaly.All these fathers on one hand did almost unbelivable - to bring a child to high level of professional level.To do that they had to have positive characteriscs such as:leadership, able to make right decisions, able to take responsibility, persistance, knowledge of basic athletic laws etc.On the other hand they abused their children in the process.We have to be sincere, and say that to bring a child to professional tennis is mentaly and physicaly abusive by itself.One does not become professional tennis player without scars.Their problem was that they were not able to control their temper;in other words their temper took over them - they lost control, and they were not aware of it.Many parents/coaches, coaches loose their temper many times, but they become aware of it, and they are able to stop.These three fathers differ in a sense that they are not aware of their behaviour, and as such they do not abuse their children from time to time, but it was permanent process.


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    In Depth Description of Bringing a Child Up a Competitive Ladder with Advices and Recommendations
    Last edited by Bubo; 08-08-2009 at 11:38 AM.

  6. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bubo View Post
    I agree with Robyna that abusive parents are more dangerous than abusive coaches, but I think the most abusive to his/her children are parents who coach them, and who are not tennis coaches.Good examples to illustrate this are Pierce, Dokic, Lucic etc.They made out of their children world class players, and in the process they abused them physically and mentaly.All these fathers on one hand did almost unbelivable - to bring a child to high level of professional level.To do that they had to have positive characteriscs such as:leadership, able to make right decisions, able to take responsibility, persistance, knowledge of basic athletic laws etc.On the other hand they abused their children in the process.We have to be sincere, and say that to bring a child to professional tennis is mentaly and physicaly abusive by itself.One does not become professional tennis player without scars.Their problem was that they were not able to control their temper;in other words their temper took over them - they lost control, and they were not aware of it.Many parents/coaches, coaches loose their temper many times, but they become aware of it, and they are able to stop.These three fathers differ in a sense that they are not aware of their behaviour, and as such they do not abuse their children from time to time, but it was permanent process.
    I must say that I know these players quite well and there fathers as well. Especially Jelena Dokic as I used to hit with her at Hopman Academy. These guys provided the money for these girls to go and get training. They knew nothing about tennis. I repeat, NOTHING! The only thing Mr. Dokic did the entire time I knew them was grunt hellos or moan about how his daughter was playing. He never had any input. If she received any coaching, it came from Jimmy Brown, Alvaro Betancur, or David Taylor while at Saddlebrook. Same with Mary Pierce. Nick Bolletieri was their first step. Believe me, he was the beginning for many of these "parental coached" players. He just didn't get the credit. I don't know Lucic or her family, so I will not speak up about her. But the other two, I trained them and was a hitting partner before Grand Slams with both. The only parent that I saw that had much input was Melanie Hingis. She mainly fed tennis balls and kept Martina's mind on the practice. Otherwise, she just observed. Same with Richard Williams. I can assure you that Nick Bolletieri is the reason that they are where they are. They would have stayed in Los Angeles otherwise and not moved to Florida. Remember, they never played junior tennis! They moved to
    Florida for the coaching.........

  7. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by tennisking1 View Post
    I must say that I know these players quite well and there fathers as well. Especially Jelena Dokic as I used to hit with her at Hopman Academy. These guys provided the money for these girls to go and get training. They knew nothing about tennis. I repeat, NOTHING! The only thing Mr. Dokic did the entire time I knew them was grunt hellos or moan about how his daughter was playing. He never had any input. If she received any coaching, it came from Jimmy Brown, Alvaro Betancur, or David Taylor while at Saddlebrook. Same with Mary Pierce. Nick Bolletieri was their first step. Believe me, he was the beginning for many of these "parental coached" players. He just didn't get the credit. I don't know Lucic or her family, so I will not speak up about her. But the other two, I trained them and was a hitting partner before Grand Slams with both. The only parent that I saw that had much input was Melanie Hingis. She mainly fed tennis balls and kept Martina's mind on the practice. Otherwise, she just observed. Same with Richard Williams. I can assure you that Nick Bolletieri is the reason that they are where they are. They would have stayed in Los Angeles otherwise and not moved to Florida. Remember, they never played junior tennis! They moved to
    Florida for the coaching.........
    Where were Wiliams when they moved from California to Florida?By Mecci or by Bolletieri?


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    In Depth Description of Bringing a Child Up a Competitive Ladder with Advices and Recommendations
    Last edited by Bubo; 08-08-2009 at 11:38 AM.

  8. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bubo View Post
    Where were Wiliams when they moved from California to Florida?By Mecci or by Bolletieri?
    They went back and forth. When one would make them mad, they would run to the other and so forth. Mainly, they got everything for free and they were not appreciative of it. Rick is a great coach as well. He and Nick could only take so much. Funny, I forgot to say that Monica Seles was with Nick very early on, but her father did it perfectly. He had input, but he did it in a very laid back way. He never fussed at her. He made it fun for her. He also believed in Nick's positive way of doing things. It worked for her. If any parent did it right, it was him. You nailed it though, Rick Macci was extremely instrumental in getting the Williams sisters going. Good call. To be honest, every coach in Florida was instrumental in getting the Williams sisters going!

  9. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by tennisking1 View Post


    They went back and forth. When one would make them mad, they would run to the other and so forth. Mainly, they got everything for free and they were not appreciative of it. Rick is a great coach as well. He and Nick could only take so much.
    Are you sure you were there at the time?This was like 17 years ago.When they moved one of the sisters was 10, and the other 9 years old.

    Why am I asking this?Because if it happened as you say, today they would be Serene and Venus Williams, but they would not be world class players.If they would move from one tennis coach to another just like you say, they would never achieve what they have had.They would be history long, long time ago.


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    In Depth Description of Bringing a Child Up a Competitive Ladder with Advices and Recommendations
    Last edited by Bubo; 08-08-2009 at 11:39 AM.

  10. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bubo View Post
    Are you sure you were there at the time?This was like 17 years ago.When they moved one of the sisters was 10, and the other 9 years old.

    Why am I asking this?Because if it happened as you say, today they would be Serene and Venus Williams, but they would not be world class players.If they would move from one tennis coach to another just like you say, they would never achieve what they have had.They would be history long, long time ago.
    I was 19 at the time and they went to Macci first. Then they went to Nick when Rick was done. They went back and forth numerous times as they burned numerous brides. I was playing the satellite and challenger circuits at the time and training in the Tampa area. I also got the low down from a guy named Roger Smith who was Jamaica's number one player at the time and he trained down there as well. The reason they are where they are is that they are athletically talented enough. Don't forget, Capriati was with Macci and then went to Bolletieri as well. One thing about Nick, he doesn't change a stroke unless it is fundamentally weak. He takes a good thing and makes it better. Macci created good fundamentals in Capriati as well and Nick didn't change her strokes either. The biggest thing though is that the parents were not the reason those girls made it to where they did. Maybe support and money wise they were, but fundamental and game wise, they were not the reason those girls are so good.......

  11. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by tennisking1 View Post
    I must say that I know these players quite well and there fathers as well. Especially Jelena Dokic as I used to hit with her at Hopman Academy. These guys provided the money for these girls to go and get training. They knew nothing about tennis. I repeat, NOTHING! The only thing Mr. Dokic did the entire time I knew them was grunt hellos or moan about how his daughter was playing. He never had any input. If she received any coaching, it came from Jimmy Brown, Alvaro Betancur, or David Taylor while at Saddlebrook.

    Dokic for becoming professional tennis player has to be grateful to national tennis federation of Australia.It may be that one point in her career she has visited and trained in the academies which you mentioned, but by that time she was already established tennis player.


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    In Depth Description of Bringing a Child Up a Competitive Ladder with Advices and Recommendations
    Last edited by Bubo; 08-08-2009 at 11:39 AM.

  12. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bubo View Post
    Dokic for becoming professional tennis player has to be grateful to national tennis federation of Australia.It may be that one point in her career she has visited and trained in the academies which you mentioned, but by that time she was already established tennis player.
    That's right. It was back in 1999-2000. She was quite a player, but she had to worry about her father and what he thought so much, it really stressed her out. It was screwy. You right about that though, she was trained by the Australions who are quite good. Pat Cash had a great thing going over on the Gold Coast, but Gavin Hopper kind of hurt it when he got in trouble for messing with young girls. Many good coaches over there. Where are you from Bubo? I am not arguing with you about any of this either. It's just these parents have tooted their horns for so long, I would like for people to realize what really happened. All of these parents are instrumental in their kids development (time, money, and support) but when it came to coaching, they did not do that. You, as a coach, realize how tough it is to bring a player up to professional status. Now, how on earth is Richard Williams going to go out on that court and teach those girls their games? He was very much a big part of their success though. No doubt about it. Believe me, if my kid wants to learn how to fly a plane, I am sending him to an instructor. I won't be pretending I can pilot a plane.

  13. #28
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    I am not arguing either, but I would not like that the readers get false picture about tennis academies.

    I will name few things which are true of all tennis academies:

    - they are business entities and as such they are out there to make money

    They make money two fold:
    1. Teach and train children how to play tennis, and they are paid for it
    2. Invest in talented children, and later on they have percentage of their earnings

    Only under number 2. academies (very few of them) help professional tennis by breeding new stars.Even then they do not start from scratch (Seles 13 years old, Majoli 13 years old), but they take already developed players, and they develop them physically, and add automatization to their strokes.

    In other cases tennis academies are really money machines which are detrimental to tennis as much as bad coaches who usually work there.The other children do not get what they paid for.The academies are not really interested in their well being as tennis players not to mention anything else.The academies do not correct already learned (they do not have quality coaches who would be able to), but reinforce it.Many players after attending tennis academies are worse than before, quit tennis completely or get injured.To tennis academies is important that they have somebody (it can practice with his/her own coach, but it is important that he/she plays on their courts) who is good and who will attract parents, and through them their children.


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    In Depth Description of Bringing a Child Up a Competitive Ladder with Advices and Recommendations
    Last edited by Bubo; 08-08-2009 at 11:40 AM.

  14. #29
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    Tennis academies are good choice for good players who come with thier coaches and use infrastructure there (court with different surfaces, gym, swimming pool , hitting partners, etc.).Not tennis staff, because this staff is of poor quality (low pay) with few exceptions who coach players in which academy invested money and expect return on investment in the future.


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    In Depth Description of Bringing a Child Up a Competitive Ladder with Advices and Recommendations
    Last edited by Bubo; 08-19-2009 at 09:39 AM.

  15. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bubo View Post
    I am not arguing either, but I would not like that the readers get false picture about tennis academies.

    I will name few things which are true of all tennis academies:

    - they are business entities and as such they out there to make money

    They make money two fold:
    1. Teach and train children how to play tennis, and they are paid for it
    2. Invest in talented children, and later on they have percentage of their earnings

    Only under number 2. academies (very few of them) help professional tennis by breeding new stars.Even then they do not start from scratch (Seles 13 years old, Majoli 13 years old), but they take already developed players, and they develop them physically, and add automatization to their strokes.

    In other cases tennis academies are really money machines which are detrimental to tennis as much as bad coaches who usually work there.The other children do not get what they paid for.The academies are not really interested in their well being as tennis players not to mention anything else.The academies do not correct already learned (they do not have quality coaches who would be able to), but reinforce it.Many players after attending tennis academies are worse than before, quit tennis completely or get injured.To tennis academies is important that they have somebody (it can practice with his/her own coach, but it is important that he/she plays on their courts) who is good and who will attract parents, and through them their children.
    That is definitely true. I must say though, I always corrected bad technique. I can't help it. The forehand grip is made only for the forehand. Not the serve or the volley. I do not think that the big academies are good unless proper technique has been shown first. Once that is established and learned, they can be as great as the player wants them to be. Any of the coaching that I have been talking about at the academies is really meant to focus on the one on one a player can get from a good coach or lets say Bollettieri or Macci. Now if there is one guy who is a stickler for technique, it's Rick Macci. I like that about him. And yes, they are money hungry. Believe me, I have a deep dislike for Howard Moore at Saddlebrook. However, there are some great coaches there. But Howard is all about Howard. We butted heads quite a bit......

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